In Which a Painfully Dull Ending is Averted

funny, the echoes
between art and life
between form and formalities

It feels like a vacuum
like between us there's no air
just space
and it bisects us
uninvited

I'm back here because I'm afraid
afraid that for all of its strengths my castle is still weak
i can guard the heel all I want
but it remains exposed

and these times,
these times are the worst
when your eyes grow soft and distant
when I can no longer calculate
but only guess

no one can get by guessing


is this the moment when it falls to the ground?
the castle will be destroyed by the elements, or by some stranger
or from within
perhaps it will just fail to support itself
it was made too hastily.


but I refuse
I won't let that happen
There was a time when I would have
i would have laughed it off like a child playing with his bricks
and went off to build something new
but you can never totally clear the canvas
there will always be remnants
and those have built up

construct
destroy
construct
destroy
and each time it gets harder

I won't do that anymore
This castle is going to stay as long as its queen wants it



2.

And what a queen!
i could speak volumes on her
safety
and support

she stays silent
it frightens me

but so often she has saved me from a swift end
has sent her subjects to fetch me from the wastelands
and in her glory she doesn't bask
but she moves away from the spotlights
the flashing bulbs of paparazzi never taint her fair skin
she is always there

and yet
have I failed to tell her this?
I forget
it is easy to take for granted something that colors your life so fully