Hold Until the Order Comes

1st Movement.

In lines
perfectly calculated
standing tall and still
waiting after all of these minutes
passing through a narrow glass funnel
some ill-constructed hourglass
blown by an apprentice, no doubt

In any event
(and during any for that matter)
we stand with the rifles resting on our weary shoulders
and we're waiting
waiting for the news to break
waiting for the experts to have their say
waiting for everything to fall into place, just as planned

And around us the cars seem much faster
the freeway on which we've stood for so long
was only recently opened for business
they decided that it was no use asking us to move anymore
the picketers have left
the police with their squealing megaphones have abandoned flashing lights

Occasionally our block is clipped
soldiers sent flying like rag dolls
skidding on the freshly laid pavement
and our focus never wavers from the horizon

For what?
That's what he always asks himself, the one who sits in the chair
he points at some pages and yells at the man with the camera
"It's all wrong, it's all wrong!"
but don't ask him what,
or even what page we're on.
What scene is this?
What sequence?

2nd Movement

It's the scene where we cross the road
and no one asks why
because the chicken is a mess of blood and guts
a few feet from where we are

the director
I guess that's what he is, though we were here before he arrived
The Director
he takes his five
off to drink again
off to ignore again

Another brave soldier goes flying as the F-150 blazes by
We hold, We wait for the order
He'll call 'action' some day
or maybe not

Writer-Director
Writer. Director.
Writer. director.

All talk, All words, All pretend.


Movement.


He's back again, talking
muttering, really
and he's depressed again
and he's pacing
We know him all too well
back when this was a field
back when we were shooting a war movie
back before the highway
It was several producers ago
He was more excited about this
but his projects don't ever go anywhere

Back on the parkway
A few of us start to lose focus
A brave one, he's no soldier anymore
he looks both ways and runs
"Fuck Ya'll, Ya'll are Crazy!"
I grab the rifle and steady it
And I see his head floating above my barrel

And there's no sound when I pull the trigger.

4th.


"Cut! Cut!"

I walk to craft services
the woman there is smiling
and she offers me a water

"I like your costume, soldier!"
She's cute. I'll probably get her number.
When we wrap, that is.
If we wrap.

How many more takes?
I see a grip run by with a longsword
Yeah, right, the big finale is coming
but the director is dead
and we're way over budget

5


It becomes apparent that I'm dreaming
and I start to analyze
suddenly the people around me are symbols
the clock starts ticking
(I can never stay lucid for long.)

A block of soldiers
it calls to mind marching band
a mysterious and attractive stranger
female producers
that other, more successful film being shot a few miles from here
that we can't ever seem to get away from

But then I'm there again,
on the freeway
and there are no symbols
and I had nodded off.

5:47 PM


My watch reads "Dinner"
The director looks out at us
and he's hopeless
and it's hopeless
and there's all kinds of cuts
but no one calls action
so we stand still and steady
in lines
uniformed
still waiting

and sometimes he's not there
and sometimes we're

sometimes I'm alone on the crowded highway
sometimes when I open my eyes I don't wake up
sometimes I'm staring at a computer
sometimes I'm driving down 49th
but I'm still on that fucking highway
Holding until the Order Comes.